I can’t believe I’m already 18. I know that this isn’t supposed to be a big deal because, obviously, it’s still such a young age, but I can’t help but to cringe at the fact that I only have a couple of years left before my age stops being a -teen. Ew.
First of all, I’m can’t be an adult. Not yet. My brain wants to explode just thinking about it. Maybe it’s because I’m not/don’t feel as independent as I think I should be at this age, or maybe I just really don’t want to grow up. I don’t know.
And then there’s the crushing reality that I’m only five feet tall and my physical appearance just screams twelve. Probably thirteen if my face is feeling it. It’s no big deal most of the time, but there are moments where it just takes a toll on me.
Anyway, I’m not planning to throw a debut party; I’m not fond of its extravagance and I’d much rather spend my money on useful things (by that, I mean clothes—lots of ’em—and books). I mean, sure, it would be a great way to celebrate a milestone, but to each his own I guess. I feel like would enjoy my birthday more with a few close people.
And now, a letter to myself, from myself:
Happy birthday! Good job on keeping yourself alive and safe, despite encountering a lot of ordeals during those past eighteen years. I’m pretty sure that so much more of it will come in the future, so just keep your head up and believe in yourself that you can do it.
Now that you’re 18, I’m sincerely hoping that you’ll finally have the courage to step out of your comfort zone. You’ve been living there for a while and I can already see the dull life that you’d have if you don’t leave. You’ve got to get out of there, man. Seriously, I think I’m seeing a patch of moss growing somewhere in there.
I know you’re thinking that there’s a huge possibility of you screwing up once you leave the zone, but isn’t that what life is all about? Screwing up and then learning from it?
Take the leap. Indiana Jones took the leap, knowing that he’d fall off a cliff, and he still lived.* Just please take the leap.
Don’t forget to have fun in life. Don’t be pissed that Niall from 1D will get a birthday hashtag on the same day as your birthday—you’ll get one someday. Don’t be easily discouraged by other people’s actions; take control of your life, just make sure that you know where to go. Don’t wait for yourself to be ready to try out new things. Just do it ✓.
And also, for the love of God, stop procrastinating.
Keep being awesome, me. Don’t stop being you (me). You do you.
*Spoilers: he lived because the cliff actually has a perfectly disguised bridge, but you get my point.